I decided to mount the photos onto foam board, which for me provided the physical support to make the photos look more sturdy and professional, whilst still being in budget.
Each image was placed onto the board and then trimmed to remove the white boarders, which enhanced the images and made them pop.
I decided to print ten photos at A1. I settled on printing ten photos as I felt that this represented the idea of mental health well enough without the work getting repetitive. I didn’t want to weaken the work by producing to many images as I felt with this project it was about what each singular image represented rather than the quantity of them.
I ideally wanted to print the images A0, however due to budget this was an unrealistic idea. For me the images needed to be big in order to create impact. I said from the start of the project that I wanted to highlight the issue of mental health and make people take note which I felt I have achieved more so by creating large prints which people can’t ignore.
The photos will be trimmed to remove the white boarders so that the viewer can fully focus and be drawn into what is happening within the photo. I will also mount the photos on to foam so they become more sturdy and look more professional.
I have began to mock up what I imagine my images to look like in a gallery space. For me, my strongest image at the moment is the centre one of scratching. The marks on my skin as well as the chipped nail varnish is not what we usually see when looking at portrait images. I want the audience to feel unfordable when looking at my images and by having them large scale and ‘in your face’ means they cannot ignore the issue of mental health.
Now that the visuals of my images appear to be more coherent, I want to really focus on what I am trying to say with my work. I want the viewers to begin to understand what it feels like to suffer with a mental illness. I am starting to do this in a number of ways such as showing the mental pain in a psychical way through the scratching images or representing how it feels to suffer with depersonalisation disorder.
After looking back over the work I have produced I felt that it wan’t very coherent, with a mix of video and photo as well of different styles of shooting.
I felt like I was trying to do to many different things, and therefore decided to cut the videos down to just one instead of three. The three felt that they didn’t go together well and felt quite random which I felt weakened the project rather than adding to it.
I have decided to focus on the ‘body’ video, which shows different parts of the body that are effected with anxiety. I visualise this being projected into a gallery space and by having it large would give the viewers an uncomfortable feeling.
I also have realised that I definetly want to produce photos like I previously spoke about alongside the video. To make the work appear more coherent I have decided to produce all my images against a black backdrop as for me they were the strongest images in term of emotion and visuals.
Another idea I wanted to focus on was the physical and emotion symptoms of a mental health disorder. These photos especially link with the video I am creating on body parts, however are not directly stills from the shoot.
When producing these images I imagined them large scale within a studio space. The images would be A1/A0 to create an impact and reinforce the message that mental health is not something that can be ignored. I purposely shown parts of my body which I normally wouldn’t want to draw attention to – lips being cut, no make up etc. and things that people would not consider beautiful. I want to focus the viewer to feel uncomfortable when viewing the images but like I said above, have no choice but to take note.
After recently visiting the doctors and being told I am showing signs of depersonalisation disorder I decided to photograph how it feels suffer from this.
‘Depersonalization disorder (DPD), also known as depersonalization/derealization disorder (DPDR), is a mental disorder in which the person has persistent or recurrent feelings of depersonalization or derealization. Depersonalization is described as feeling disconnected or detached from one’s self.’
For me the main symptom is feeling detached from one’s self as mentioned above and loosing grip of myself. I used motion blue within the photos to give the feeling of loosing myself, which I feel as a set of photographs work well in creating emotion. The photos themselves are very simple – using a black backdrop with a black top to create this feeling of simplicity. I did not wear make up which is something that I will rarely show people, which for me adds a feeling of venerability to the work.
I see my final project being displayed in a gallery space with the video/videos I am creating being projected onto a wall with the sounds filling the room.
However, I feel that the videos alone do not portray my message strong enough. Because of this I am considering combing both video and photos together. the content will be connected to each other, even taking stills from the video and producing large scale photos that will be also placed within the gallery space.
Originally I started to place the text separate to the actual video clips, so the words would flash up and then you would see the footage. However, I felt that the text looked out of place and the video didn’t flow well.
I therefore started overlaying the text onto the video clips, and felt that this worked a lot better.
I feel that the video begins to make more sense when the text is added and it introduces the audience to the idea of how I am feeling without being to obvious.
I have decided against recording a speech to go over my video. I feel that I would not be able to get anyone to do it and therefore it would weaken the project overall. I also felt that because the project is such a person piece of work, it felt wrong to get somebody else to do the speech and I did not feel comfortable myself to do it.
I felt that my first project on the MA course was my strongest. I produced a book in which I included photographs based around social anxiety and then paired them with text that was handwritten. This gave the work a very personal feel which is something I feel could be lost within this project.
I have decided that instead of using speech within my project to use the same writing that I used within the same project. I feel this will make the work feel a lot more personal again and was one of the strongest elements of the first project. I will experiment with placing it after certain images and flashing the text on the screen quickly so that the viewer is given glimpses of what the video is about.
Below shows the progress of my videos so far:
Final Major Project Kirsty Powell